Death Comes To Us All

Dear Ladies,



We have been doing more then our fair share dinner with a movie. When Eric is gone we tend to be more relaxed about dinner. Sometimes I will decide we better start acting normal and eat dinner at the table. BUT we are all enjoying our dinner/movie nights, do we really need to be normal. We have watched most of the PG movies from the Redbox that we wanted to see; that may cause us to have to stop our movie watching or find a different rental source.



My father is 88 years old and isn't doing very well. We are hoping he will hang in there until after May 6th when Eric is due home. I really don't want to deal with the funeral without him to tempter family feelings. My Dad has been married three times and has children from his first two marriages.



My dad was born in 1921, only attender school through the 8th grade when he had to start working to help support the family. He was one of 12 children. He has outlived all but the youngest sister. He was drafted to serve in World War II, was wounded twice and was part of the occupation force in Japan. He saw airplane and automobile travel become the norm. He saw the invention of the tv, phone, computers, washing machines, radios, microwaves, and bubble gum. I was blessed to have a wonderful visit, the best one in a long time, in November. We attended church with him, his wife, my sister and her boys. Afterwards we went out to lunch, then to their new home for a visit. I'm thankful for that visit. I have chosen not to go to NY now, but have talked to him a few minutes on the phone.

Death is a part of life and sometimes is very hard for us to understand. Children handle death so much better then we do. I think sometimes they wonder why we are crying. Isn't going home to be with Jesus what we all want to do? So how do we has moms handle explaining the death of a loved one to our little ones?

1. Explain to your child that they have gone to see Jesus. For some children this is all they will need.

2. Comfort them and allow them to cry, but don't be upset if they don't show any sorrow.

3. If they are beyond the toddler years take them to the visitation or the funeral. Explain to them before hand that they will be viewing the person's body or shell, but their spirit or the part we loved is with Jesus.

4. If you aren't sure the person was saved it is a little bit more difficult. Let your child know their spirit is gone and leave it at that.

5. Talk about the things you loved or did with the person. Enjoy sharing funny stories with them and ask them to share something they remember.

6. Talk about death before it happens. Talk about how grandparents wouldn't always be with us, so we have to enjoy them while we can. Let them know it is a part of life. If you have a pet who dies, even a goldfish, use this as an opportunity to talk about death.

7. Pray and ask for guidance.

We lost two young cousins in a car accident 5 years ago. That was a difficult death for my children and there was no explanation as to why it happened. We knew that both children had made Jesus their savior, so we could rejoice in knowing that they were with Jesus. Sometimes all you can do is cry together and say we don't understand why such an accident could happen. It is ok to be honest with your children, they will have a better understanding of death when we address their questions honestly.

Have a wonderful weekend with your family and rejoice in each new day God gives us to enjoy each other.

Melissa